Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Heritage Park

Life is short.
In the end it is only the impact you have made on others and the tangible heirlooms you managed to create, that will remain long after you are gone. This morning my Dad pulled out this beautiful quilt that his grandmother had quilted: she's been gone for over forty years. She stopped quilting twenty years prior to her death...I never knew my great-grandma, but sitting here, writing this and thinking of her quilt, I realize that only scraps of memory exist of her full life. Her memory is carried in the minds and hearts of her aging children, all now over the age of eighty, and tangible to her grandchildren only in the squares and patterns of her quilts. She raised twelve children (gave birth to fourteen) on a farm in Arkansas, during the depression. My grandmother is the youngest of her children, now 84 years old. Throughout her life, she has made a quilt for each grandchild, newlywed couple, and great grandchild that came into her family. Some day my children will ask, where the old quilts in the closet came from, and I will tell them of the remarkable woman, who was their great-grandmother. A woman who loved her family, and raised four children in Covina. An ordained minister of the Four Square Church: who performed countless weddings (including a few of her own grandchildren's), dedicated her great-grandchildren to the Lord, and walked the halls of the local hospitals sharing the name, and love of Jesus Christ with twenty years worth of patients, in desperate need of a savior. And the impact and legacy of my grandmother's life will continue...
Just like her mother before her.

I have learned a lot about life in the last month. Messages, books, movies, and people: all serving to remind me of the brevity of one's life. Each stage, and day of my life is a gift. I want my life, and the things I do on this Earth to matter, to count for something other than a short span of time that was taken up by meaningless effort to find fulfillment. I want to spread the name of Jesus Christ with my actions, and words.I know that there will be more people in heaven because of the dedication and diligence my grandmother has shown, in effort to share the amazing love of our savior with those patients. I want to be remembered in the same way that she will be. This life will eventually end for me, and the only thing that will remain will be the impact that I make on the lives of others.

Monday, December 29, 2008


I know this is trivial, I'll admit it.
However, the musical possibilities this union may present are NOT.
Zooey Deschanel and Ben Gibbard, may or may not be engaged (I try NOT to rely heavily on supermarket tabloids for credible information).

John and Yoko,
Sunny and Cher,
Johnny and June,
Zooey and Ben...

It fits...
Maybe Baby.

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes

Silver white winters that melt into springs
These are a few of my favorite things
(The Holiday edition)

1. Christmas Lights

2. Christmas songs: I established a few favorites this year*

"All I want for Christmas is you" -Mariah Carey(Don't judge Me)
"What Christmas Means to Me" -Stevie Wonder
"Baby Please come home"-Ben Gibbard
"Last Christmas"- WHAM!

3. Christmas Shopping (Has anyone been to Victoria Gardens? It is like a
mini-shopping city.Definitely worth checking out.)

4. Seeing SNOW on the mountains

5. Christmas sweater parties: Just can't get enough of them...

Exhibit A:

6. Christmas Cookie Parties


8. The Holiday Shopper?

Now, I know that generally the Holiday season is infamous for bringing out the WORST in the American consumer: creating greedy, angry, bargain hunting shoppers.
However, this Christmas, I have met more patient, kind,and caring people, than I can count on one hand. I don't know if people are just more appreciative of the little things this year, but my customers have been willing to chit-chat long after they're shopping is completed, have graciously allowed me to ring others before themselves, and have been overly appreciative of my assistance. Refreshing.


Isaiah 9: 6-7
" For to us a child is born,
to us a son is given,
and the government will be on his shoulders.
And he will be called
Wonderful Counselor, [b] Mighty God,
Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.

Of the increase of his government and peace
there will be no end.
He will reign on David's throne
and over his kingdom,
establishing and upholding it
with justice and righteousness
from that time on and forever.
The zeal of the LORD Almighty
will accomplish this."

MERRY CHRISTMAS to All, and to All a good night...

Monday, December 22, 2008


And Mary said:
"My soul glorifies the Lord
and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior,
for he has been mindful
of the humble state of his servant.
From now on all generations will call me blessed,
for the Mighty One has done great things for me-
holy is his name.
His mercy extends to those who fear him,
from generation to generation."

Luke 1: 46-50

We serve a great and gracious God. Who chooses to use lowly, unworthy, human beings to do great things in his name: King David, The Apostle Paul, Esther, Moses, and Mary. God does not NEED us to accomplish his will. However, he allows us the great privilege of being used to further his kingdom. Vessels and tools in his hand, as he moves in people's lives, and accomplishes his sovereign plan through us. I am repeatedly amazed.

Sunday, December 21, 2008

A day dedicated to me?

Oh thank you Sarah, I feel so special. legit. Watch it, and wish you were this cool.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008


I have officially caved to the pop-culture driven, Twilight Phenomenon.
I read the book, skeptically at first. "Not my kind of book" I said, "I don't have time" I said. Well...come to find out: it IS my kind of book, and I MADE the time to read the first book(currently reading the second). When the movie came out, I had yet to start the book: if it was NOT my kind of book, it was definitely NOT my kind of movie. Then tonight, after reading the book(always better), I decided on a whim to go see the movie.(Perhaps not of my own volition, I was semi-convinced/FORCED to see it by a true twilight cheerleader, Miss Stefanie Bammer).

*First Impressions: Over-actor award of the year goes to...Robert Pattinson(Edward Cullen.) Bad special effects, and sadly, a lot of the details were lost in translation from book to film.

However, after thinking about the book details in relation to the film, and paying attention to the (as Stefanie pointed out)amazing sound track:I decided that I loved the movie. Great film. Did any of you critics pay attention to the background tunes? Radiohead, Muse, Iron&Wine. Completely legit.

I liked it, I loved it. It was not the book, how could it be? There is so much you can write in a book,and so many pictures you can paint with words, that cannot translate onto the screen. I just took the movie, as it was: knowing what I know about the book and relating those details to what I saw in the film. It worked and I thoroughly enjoyed it. My advice, read the book first and connect the dots.

(Sarah-- I'm totally down to see it again)

Deck the Halls...

In the last couple months, I have gotten to know a group of amazing girls. They are all so different, yet with striking similarities. Which reminds me of the amazing unity that comes from being a follower of Christ. Anyway, who are these amazing girls you might ask? Well, I'm privileged to be a small group leader with one of my amazing friends, Pam, for our high school group's froshmore(freshman & sophomore) girls.

We recently got to have a fabulous night, of cookie baking and movie watching fun. If I may flatter myself, I throw a mean cookie decorating party...even though my dear sweet, amazing cook of a mother, did most of the work.
I must say that some of the girls may have a possible career in cake decorating: They ALL displayed some very impressive skills.

The fruits(cookies) of our labor.

Such a fun time! Ate way too much frosting, cookies, and soup. However, totally worth it.
Merry ALMOST Christmas...

Saturday, December 13, 2008

Cool Camp Videos

Does anyone else remember being scared beyond words when your trusty camp leaders showed all 150 students this great video?

Oh wait, your leaders didn't show you this?

Sunday, December 7, 2008

You say goodbye, I say Hello

All the good ones go away.
Doesn't it sometimes feel that way?
(I'm the rhymnoceros- Hopefully SOMEONE catches my Flight of the Conchords Reference)

For instance, I have now worked at Nordstrom for a little over a year. I have met so many nice people. When you work with people all the time, because your shifts co-inside it makes for a lot of extra "bonding" time.Even though we aren't supposed to be "making small talk" on the selling floor. 8 hour shifts + a store that is slow 90% of the year + lots of interaction with other departments = you're bound to make a few friends. However the sad thing about work friends, is that they often move on to other opportunities. They move, switch stores, get promotions, go to lunch and never come back(yes, this happened*), switch departments, or just quit. It is really sad. I hate it. I feel like everyone that I REALLY like has left or is leaving: MOST of the people I started with are long gone.

Of course with employees leaving, we DO get new people: sometimes a good thing, I'm lookin' up...but it tis bitter-sweet.
I really do feel like it is all the good ones that go away.

Oh, but I DID get to visit the VERY FIRST Nordstrom, while I was in Seattle. And the Love affair continues...

See the Glorious sign through the trees? I MADE the girls go inside the store, because after all... how often do I go to Seattle?

(Also, B I can't wait for you to come home!!)

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Killing Me Softly

Benefit of the Doubt. I find that giving people this, often leads to disappointment. We use phrases like "One more chance" and "One last time", trying to believe that people will change or somehow prove that they are worthy of those chances. Not one time, that I can recall, have I given someone the "benefit of the doubt" and been completely happy I did so. Most of the time, I end up kicking myself for repeatedly allowing myself to be vulnerable to the hurt that comes from repetitive forgiveness and wishful thinking.

Lord, How do you do it?
So many chances, so much forgiveness. I can barely handle the verbal repetition of apology and forgiveness: without true change.

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Head -Over Heals

In the last month, I have experienced on THREE SEPARATE occasions the kind of "brotherly" affection that brings me back to fifth grade(or so).
I've been left, shaking my head in confusion three different times in ONE month.

My older brother used to give me what I can only label as a "headlock/noogy", painful and embarrassing. I wasn't sure if this was the exact term, so I went to a reliable source. The trusty word-bank, known as : reliable, second only to Wikipedia*).

Turns out that "noogy" IS the correct term, and here's the definition:

"To grab someone around the neck with your arm, pull their head against your body (thus subduing them), make your other hand into a fist, and grate your knuckles painfully against their scalp. If you're sneaky enough, grabbing them around the neck may not be necessary.

A favorite tactic among bullies and older siblings."

Yep, totally accurate.


Occasion #1:
Culprit: John Krutsinger

We were at the election party, and I got up to say goodbye. He flips me around and puts me in a head-lock, and gives me a noogy. "Seriously?" I think, I'm a girl. YOU DON'T give girls noogies, unless they're your sister.

Occasion #2:
Culprit: Adam Sabolick

Going on-stage, right before worship on Sunday Morning. I compliment him on his orange, puffy vest and say "Adam, I haven't seen you in so long" and precede to give him a hug. Then it happened AGAIN. He grabs my neck and gives me a noogy. Messing up my hair, and causing me stumble awkwardly onto the stage. Fixing my hair as I go.

Occasion #3:
Culprit: Frank Sanchez

After the "Thanksgiving-Eve" service, chatting a bit with Frank. I said something cheeky, and it happened for the third time in a month. He hugged me and turned it into a headlock/noogy.

Why? I don't understand...
I'm not a boy, and I'm not their sister: maybe "In Christ", but that is AS far as it goes.


Oh the head shaking, mysteries of life.

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Oh, Canada

I think I would have thought the world was coming to an end, had I seen this BRIGHT flaming ball headin' my way.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Rock around the clock tonight...

Three Days Until I'm here:

I feel like this is what I have been waiting for, since the day we bought our tickets.
I made it through mid-terms, through my sister's amazing(yet highly stressful)wedding and now I'm looking forward to an amazing vacation!

I get to see my loves, and get to experience a glimpse of what has become their everyday.

+Get to visit the VERY first Nordstrom.
+Finally feel like it is Fall!
+Wear winter clothes: scarves, hats, coats, boots.

Friday, October 24, 2008


I would love to be described as charming: "She is a very charming girl" or "She has a charming personality" or maybe "She has a charming disposition."
It just sounds so classy.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Sweet Caroline

duh, duh, duh...
good times never seemed so seemed so good.

I'm done, free, and oh so happy to A) Say that I now have a married sister, and an amazing new brother B) Happily admit that I survived giving my toast and C) Finished mid-terms!

Feelings: Relief, Wonder, Thankfulness.

Once again, God has shown himself so faithful in my life.

" For great is your love, higher than the heavens;
your faithfulness reaches to the skies."
-Psalm 108:4

He has seen me through every stress and worry, and I am confident that He will continue to do so. He never leaves, never forsakes. He is patient with my doubts, and shows me unending mercies. He never fails. And for this: I am so thankful. I would have no hope, no light at the end of every trial, no constant feeling that everything will turn out alright: if not for the loving reassurance of my savior.

Psalm 121

"A song of ascents.

1 I lift up my eyes to the hills—
where does my help come from?
2 My help comes from the LORD,
the Maker of heaven and earth.

3 He will not let your foot slip—
he who watches over you will not slumber;

4 indeed, he who watches over Israel
will neither slumber nor sleep.

5 The LORD watches over you—
the LORD is your shade at your right hand;

6 the sun will not harm you by day,
nor the moon by night.

7 The LORD will keep you from all harm—
he will watch over your life;

8 the LORD will watch over your coming and going
both now and forevermore."

*This post is a random mix of thanksgiving and updates, of which I am aware. Bear with me, friends.

Things I can now EXCITEDLY look forward to:
-Seeing Bethany this week!!
-Palm Springs in November
-Flying to Seattle, with Carrie, to spend a long weekend w/my favorite girls(B&T)
-Cold Weather

(It is just all fun and games from here on out, yay!)

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

All Time Low

Today I hit an all time low...
and NOT for reasons that would be expected of a student struggling through mid-terms.

Today while meandering through BIG LOTS(Formerly Pic-N-Save), I was humming whatever song was blaring over the state of the art sounds system. When it happened...
I walked past the kitchen isle, Halloween decorations/costumes(complete with plastic machetes, masks, and other haunting decorations), christmas decorations (Which I'm pretty sure they carry year-around), and was making my way toward the back of the store when I looked down the isle to my right as I passed: I see a man (Total father of four material), in a collared shirt.
Just out of my peripheral vision.
I thought nothing of it...until I began to make my way back towards the front of the store.
I passed the home decor isle and saw the same "Dad." This time I look as I pass and he smiles and says "Hello."
As I'm thinking just how weird that was...I hear "Hello, excuse me...".
I turn and see "World's Greatest Dad" looking at me. He's like "Oh, I'm don't work here, do you?"

No, No Dad of the year...I don't work at Big Lots. I can't direct you to the isle with the 5 year old canned goods, or last year's Halloween candy.


Other random things I found there:
-Guitar shaped plastic containers with Elvis on the front, filled with pop-corn(I also located large plastic beer bottles filled with the like)
-Blistex for 59 cents (A find indeed)
-A (plastic) machete and butcher knife (Which Chris and I chased each other around the store with)
-A bag full of "fun-sized" pop-rocks (Chris just couldn't pass this deal up)

Oh Big Lots, A storehouse of cheap random items.

*Side Note: Has everyone at least BEEN into SMART&FINAL.
That place is amazing, its like costco with party stuff and TONS of fresh baked goods *IN BULK

Oh the places I have been, in search of random wedding items.

Saturday, October 11, 2008

Extra Points

For Creativity.

You got to hand it to the guy, he had a lot of nerve proposing on national television. Lets ponder JUST how awkward the segment would have been if she said "NO".

Monday, October 6, 2008

Scary Stuff.

The DOW had dropped 500 points when I woke up this morning...
Then it dropped to 700...
My brother refreshed the page just now and the Yahoo News headline said it is down 800 points.
The first time its dipped below 10,000 since 2004.

What happened to our knight in shining armor: 700 billion dollars coming to our rescue? All the talk of the "Bail-Out Plan" helping?

I have not really followed the stock market very closely or monitored how the world economy was functioning. However, this is BIG. Scary Big. Germany, Russia and other parts of Europe are now effected.

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Dum, Dum, Da Dum

My sister gets married in exactly 17 days...
Thoughts on the subject:

- Still have to buy shoes to go with my dress.
- Still have to finish writing my Maid of Honor Toast.
+- Excited for the wedding, scared to death about the toast (99.99% chance I'll cry)
+Can't wait to see my brother and his family!
+Can't wait to see Crista coming down the isle
-That week is going to be crazy.My mid-terms land smack dab in the middle of the "wedding week". My whole family will be out and I'll be locked away studying computer programs and the US Constitution. Solid.


I tend to dread classes where the professor announces on the first day that the class is a "discussion class." Which automatically either means, (A) Random Fire questions are used to spur on discussion or(B) the teacher waits for people to raise their hands...which leaves it up to certain group of "constant hand-raisers" to dominate where the discussions lead. Either way, maybe its because I am really bad at impromptu speaking or the fact I am just not that eager to spread my opinions around...I hate both ways of conducting discussions.

Anyway yesterday while we were discussing a film on female workers in Mexico, I took a few notes on the members of this group of "constant hand-raisers." All of them are very distinct, each with there own unique characteristics and tactics in making their points.

(1)The Loud-Pregnant Chick who sits in the front-
I have two classes with her, and yet in my Women's Studies class she is exceedingly boisterous. She always speaks just a few decibels higher than anyone else in the class. She blurts out anything and everything she thinks, until someone cuts her off or our Professor turns the conversation away from what she is yelling about.

(2) The 40 year old feminist who is taking the class for fun-
There is a lady who sits in the far right of the classroom and talks to the Prof all the time. She is a wealth of information on the economy, and unions. She boldly blurts out that women should be able to work construction and any other "male oriented" job they so please, in fact SHE HAS. She worked construction for years; her and her boots, or sandals with socks loved it. She is pretty legit, although secretly I'm pretty sure she is just dying to teach the class. Just one time.

(3) The captain obvious students-
These kids rarely talk during discussion time. But when they do...the class is left thinking "what, are you serious?" For instance in class we are discussing the injustices imposed upon workers, by the factories who are operating in the free trade zones in Mexico.Women are the primary workers, therefore they are the primary victims. However, even though this fact has been discussed repeatedly over and over again, there is always that one person that raises their hand to passionately blurt out "Well women are the ones suffering!" like this is some novel idea. The whole class is stifling a "duh!"

(4) The know-it-all in the back of the class-
There is this one Indian guy who sits in the back of the class, he sits with his girlfriend(who always looks embarrassed when he takes the floor). He always starts out dove-tailing on what someone else just said, he starts with "That may be true, but..." or "Here's the thing about that...". When he does this, he sounds like he is going to make some sense. Then he just goes on and on about the same thing, usually using circular reasoning that only confuses the class and leaves a "Where the heck are you going with this" look on the Proffessor's face. The bad thing is, he is completely oblivious to visual signs. Blank stares, other people raising their hands trying to be heard...he ignores them all. Further hammering out his pointless point. Completely cocky about it the entire time.

(5) The one worth hearing out-
There is this one girl in my class who is so brilliant, I'm convinced, and yet you would never know it. She is calm, and actually raises her hand versus blurting out her points. She links things together in ways that totally make sense, and yet offer a completely new outlook on the topic. She is one really worth listening to. I like her, I wish I could eloquently make my points without being boring or like any of the people above.


Cheers to the "Constant Hand-raisers" of the American Classroom.

Sunday, September 28, 2008


I was on my bed chatting with my Mom and my Brother, when my brother pushes the dog off the bed and she freaks out. She starts barking and my brother being the pain in the butt that he is: starts yelling "who's here Lola? Go get 'em!"
She flips out and runs out of my room, then the door bell rings. I jokingly yell "there's my boyfriend!" and start running with the dog to get the door. Then I look down my stairs and see a guy at my front door. My brother yells "They're trying to open our door!" I look closer and the man at my door starts shining in his flashlight and pounding on the door. I back up and yell for my Dad. He goes down to open the door to the out of control Police officer, that is pounding on our door at ten o'clock at night. My Dad opens the door and the officer looks in and is like "Do I have the wrong house? What number is this?" We tell him our number and he talks into the dispatch receiver on his uniform. The person on the other end corrects him, by saying the disturbance is at number 63. He runs across the street and starts pounding on #63's door, then another police car pulls up. Along with a fire engine. Our patio overlooks number 63's patio and we witnessed the whole thing.

The man who lived just across the grassy island that separates the houses, had a heart attack and died. Just like that. Right on his patio, the same place he sat every morning and every night.

From our patio we could see his wife crying on their bed, and the officer trying to console her. It was the saddest picture, I can't even imagine that feeling. Utter despair, fear, knowing you've lost someone you love and thought you couldn't live with out. As I write this, I can hear her crying across the way.

Please pray for this woman. That God will bring peace and comfort to her and her family. And ultimately, that he would reveal himself to her through this terrible time.


2 Corinthians 1: 3&4

"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God."

Rick, Rick, Rick

Remember that Rick?!
To all my fellow Kaitlin Lovers...

The original: (Excuse the commercials, none the less: totally worth the wait)

And here's a good one, but the embedding feature was disabled.

Monday, September 22, 2008

Death by Computer Science

Last month, while choosing my classes and gearing up for the beginning of school my sister suggested that because I need a science, I should do an easy course. Such as: COMPUTER SCIENCE. "I like computers" I thought-- and my dear sister said her class was a piece of cake. Taking her words of wisdom, I decided to enroll. The first couple of weeks I LOVED it...then, as of late, things have taken a turn for the worse.

I signed up for the free software (upon my thick-accented teacher's request) so I can finish our in-class projects at home. Unfortunately once it finished downloading, I thought that I had wasted all that time downloading the wrong software...then I realized I just needed to burn the software onto a disc. Okay, I could do that. Then I realize I don't have any blank CD's. Shoot. So I go to class with out my project and realize that we have a quiz...which consists of basically a sheet of paper and we have to build a program to produce the content as its output. Great. I finally finish it, and give it to my prof...then he writes -4 on it. I ask him why he did that and he is like "You asked me 2 questions". Apparently questions asked on quizzes are worth two points each, which are taken off your over-all grade.He never stated this. Nice.

Then I miss my Thursday class due to traffic + NO PARKING. Now today I try to burn the program on the blank CD I stole from the church (Thanks Carrie;) and it does not have enough memory to retain all the information. GREAT. So I was resolved to just print the three problems I had already completed and call it a night, then I go to get it out of my email... and the email containing the project has magically disappeared.

Great, awesome.
Crista...thanks for the great advice.
Remind me to thank you for it when I see you!


Thursday, September 18, 2008

November Rain

Late Last month My darlings packed their bags and headed(Via Train--yah, they're THAT cool) to Seattle, Washington. They set out in search of a new environment and an uplifting, spiritually enriched atmosphere. The answer to their search came by way of dove...the Calvary Dove to be exact (God usually uses doves, as you may know). They are now attending Calvary Chapel Bible College In Seattle, and LOVIN' it! However, since the last night I saw them--I have missed them dearly. Sometimes I'll get out of class early and think, "Oh, I'll see if B wants to go for a bike ride" or "Maybe Tita wants to come hang out while I clean my room" or "We should all go to the Coffee Klatch." (Oh, how I miss those late night chats over Chai)


Come November 14th, I'll get to see these party animals once again!

Can't Wait to see you Ladies!

Thanks to Carrie for letting me tag along on her trip...
And I was kiddin' about the Dove, occasionally God uses donkeys and snakes.

Monday, September 8, 2008

The Cure

I am going to cure myself of awkwardness...
You watch. I'll do it.
By NOT acknowledging awkward moments, it is my intention to see them magically disappear.

Step #1: Delete blog that is dedicated solely to awkward moments in life.

Fiercy Piercy

Last night a group of us headed up to the Hollywood bowl to see radiohead. Carrie, Stefanie, Pierce and myself were in the furthest possible seats from the stage. Fourth bench from the back of the amphitheater. If you've been to the Bowl, you know that the air may or may not be thinner up there. One girl was trying to find her seat and remarked that her " nose was bleeding", seemingly due to the altitude. Alright, I'm exaggerating...but they were pretty bad seats. The show was still amazing, bringing me near tears at times. Even though I have been repeatedly criticized for not being the biggest fan of radiohead. However, things took a turn for the better when we decided to stick around in our seats to wait for the crowds to disperse. That delay allowed us to find ourselves in front of the "Artist Entrance" just as a small crowd began to gather. Rumors of the band's possible exit through the mentioned door, began to circulate through the small cluster of fans. Soon Phil the drummer was gracefully making his rounds up and down the guard rail, signing shirts/tickets anything sign-able and taking pictures.

Our foursome decided that the only way to prove that this miraculous event took place, was to snap a picture with Phil. He graciously consented and we all gathered in, my head blocking his view of the camera and Pierce mistakingly clutching Phil's shoulder instead of Stef's. Someone offers to take it for us, but around the time the camera SHOULD have been flashing: the lens recedes back into its place and the camera shuts off. Someone else steps in and heroically attempts to fix the camera and take the picture. After what seemed like an eternity, the camera still was not working. Finally, some random kid is like "Here I'll take it!" and FINALLY we get a picture. (Carrie, if you're reading this: Email him!). Anyway, super awkward moment. Everyone staring at us, waiting to get their stuff signed and pictures taken. And us, holding this stupid pose for seriously at least two minutes.

Then, the security guards announce that Thom is coming out...we all have our tickets, albums, ipods/iphones out and ready to be signed. At that moment, the realization hits: Thom Yorke is coming out through the door directly in front of us. After several false alarms, he walks out, black velvet in hand (A drink Bono introduced him to: Champagne and Guinness) and graciously makes his way to the crowd. Everyone of us, are in awe. Completely silent. However, leave it to Pierce to say what he thinks. He remarks, rather loudly, "Wow, he's a little guy." Every head turns in our direction. I am not sure if Thom heard, but...needless to say: awkward moment number two.

This is Pierce. Pierce is probably one of the most enjoyable people to be around, simply because Piece is: awkward. Entertainingly so. He is one of the founding fathers of the wolf-pack, former barista to the stars, and the guy you hope makes your non-fat vanilla latte every morning...just so you can hear his stories. Beloved Pierce managed to make something so amazing into a comically awkward situation.

Anyway...awkwardness at a radiohead concert: dedicated to Pierce.

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Harvest (Not the Holloween Festival)

This years Harvest Crusade topped the charts, if I may be so BOLD as to say. I have attended the crusades with my family since I was five. Every year I'm touched by the mass amount of people that flood the field to receive the gift of salvation, through Christ Jesus. This year I attended both Saturday and Sunday night(I was not planning on either one). It totally slipped my mind that we were taking the High School kids to the youth event on Saturday night, and I was charmed into going with Carrie on Sunday night. Anyway, Saturday night was really great. Not because of the bands, although P.O.D and Kutless (My two favorite bands--;) totally rocked, but because of the lives that were changed all over the stadium. It is an amazing thing to watch the packed stadium empty out as people flood the field.

However, the second night was, for me, the most touching. I ended up having to go with Carrie onto the field for follow up counseling, even though I didn't have a badge. So...yes, as Carrie stated--people thought I was getting saved as well. But whatever, it was seriously worth it. I have never been on the field during the alter call, and I was so astounded by the sudden change in atmosphere. When you are looking up at the stands and watching the rows of broken hearted, humbled people, stumbling onto the lawn in a daze of tears and emotion: it is a completely different scene from the one witnessed in the bleachers. As Pastor Greg gave the alter call on Sunday night he stated that those who's hearts were softened should do what over 7 THOUSAND PEOPLE, had done in the first two nights and make a commitment to Christ. As I stood there, I realized the power of the gospel message. The power of the name above all names, that can shake the hearts of thousands of people and draw them to himself instantaneously. This verse came up on my DBV and it seemed to be the most appropriate verse to include in this post:

"Therefore God exalted him to the highest place
and gave him the name that is above every name,
that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow,
in heaven and on earth and under the earth,
and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord,
to the glory of God the Father."

Philippians 2:9-11

Just to make things clear, the statement in the first line of this post was simply a personal observation. And the event did not "top the charts" because the Harvest team did anything different, or because the bands were any better, or the message any simply impacted my life this year, more than any other year that I have attended. It was my own personal perception of this year's crusade, and it was truly an amazing gift to be a part of it.

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Laurie Peters

This evening was like most Tuesday evenings, slow and boring.
Until a lone "customer" made it an evening to remember.

I was doin' my thang...sizing and colorizing the sale rounders, when I see a woman with a handful of items rush by. She has a few pairs of True Religion jeans and other items stacked over her arm. When I ask if she needs a room, she declines my offer. I thought this odd, since it looked as if her arm would fall off if she were to add anything else to her pile. Then without warning about 15 minutes later I see a rush of activity coming from the lingerie department, I see the same woman at the register dumping her items on the cash-rap. Out of the corner of my eye I see a woman on a walkie talkie running down the back isle, yelling "GO TO PETITES!" to the person on the opposite end. Before I know it I see the sketchy female "customer" running out the door with a pair of jeans in her arms. She runs out onto the bridge that connects the second story with the parking structure. I hear screaming and I, as well as various other employees, run to the middle isle to get a clear view of the events as they unfold. I see two people from Loss Preventions tackling the lady, she's screaming and crying. One of the guys had literally jumped on top of her and was wrestling her down to the ground. She was struggling and screaming at the top of her lungs. Apparently, The person who was waiting in the car for her just outside the door, booked it as soon as he saw her being captured. Bummer. I guess that is one way to find out who your true friends are.

Anyway...thank you sketchy shop-lifting lady for making my Tuesday night pass a little quicker than usual.

*We at Nordstrom take designer jeans very serious, so don't try to lift a pair on your way out. You will be caught and brutally wrestled to the ground.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Thanks YouTube

I guess the She&Him Video for "Why Do You Let Me Stay Here" premiered on MTV a few days ago...not sure how I feel about IT. Leaning towards corny, but also love the band/song so much its hard to decipher my feelings on the matter.

Here's this little ditty for your viewing pleasure:

Johnny Cash and June Carter...
Singing one of my favorite duets.

This is what I do with my precious days off.

Shifting Shadows

James 1:17
"Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow."

*Thanks DBV(Daily Bible Verse), you managed to throw out one of my favorite verses on July 14th. This verse always leads my thoughts to this song...

With rain, with sun
With much, with less
With joy, with pain
With life, with death

The only things that satisfy come from You
They come from You

Everything that's beautiful
Everything that's wonderful
Every perfect gift comes from You

It comes from the Father of Lights
It comes from the Giver of Life
It comes from the Heavens above
It's coming straight from Your heart
To the people You love

Why don't we sing this anymore?

Thursday, July 10, 2008

O' happy day

The official Party Pics...
Randomly ordered.

Camera Creds: Bethany Pee

Tuesday, July 8, 2008


Thanks Gals, You rock my socks off.

The night was...ultra-fab.

Saturday, July 5, 2008

All you need is Love

I love how awkward kid-crushes can turn into meaningful, much appreciated friendships. I've decided that people grow in and out of love...or what they "think" is love. Also wondering, how you know if it(love) will remain. How do you know If it is worth fighting for? So far all I've got is that earthly love is fleeting and based on ever-changing emotions, heavenly love never fails. For now, I'll cherish the love that is constant...until someone comes along who proves me wrong.

Psalm 103:17
"But from everlasting to everlasting the LORD's love is with those who fear him, and his righteousness with their children's children-"

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

He remains

I have been having this feeling of complete complacently, as of late. I had this sinking feeling that because I was not doing anything new or exciting with the love I have for Christ, it would disappear. It would somehow be null and void. I wanted to go and DO something different, I had this burning desire to ACT upon the faith that I have. Things kept falling through and my faith in His perfect will began to waver.

Why do I let my circumstances determine the amount of faith I have in Christ, the faith I have in his will for my life? I started reading 1st and 2nd Timothy this last week, thanks to some references Carrie brought out in our bible study. I love how when questions and insecurities seem overwhelming, words of surety seem to make themselves clearly visible in his word.

1 Timothy 2:13

" If we are faithless, He remains faithful. He cannot deny Himself"

1 Tim 3:14-15
"(14)But you must continue in the things you have learned and been assured of, knowing from whom you have learned them (15) and from childhood you have known the scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus."

I need to continue in faithfulness, relying on his perfect will. The beauty of the Christian life, is knowing that even when my faith in Him wavers, He remains unfailing.

Monday, June 30, 2008

Thought Bubble


-I have developed a strange affinity for vanilla ice-cream(Used to hate it)

-I really love people who can remember your name, when you've only met once

-I am thoroughly enjoying Coldplay's newest musical/lyrical novelty

-Why doesn't anyone call them Deathcab for Cutie anymore?

-Biking is invigorating...biking to the gym and back: painful

-Sometimes I wish I was a boy, more freedom

-Nordstrom is killing me, my summer is disappearing and my work schedule is increasing in hours(I am reminded of how this is to be my life, from here on out)

-"I'm so lonesome I could cry..." -Hank Williams

- Enjoying meeting with the ladies, for weekly bible studies
-I am completely uncoordinated (Taking Hip-Hop classes at the gym, only serves to make this point MORE obvious) *Going with a former dancer--the worst Idea*

-I'm really stoked about helping out in high school, three solid weeks under my belt.

-19 sounds JUST as young as 18

- I really miss Aubree-Anna

-In church you become friend with people, whom outside of church, you may have never even met: I enjoy having one common bond with so many

(Pointless thought post #2)

Monday, June 16, 2008


I like this one too Carrie.

Saturday, June 14, 2008

& then...

I came, I went, I saw... I left disappointed.

Zooey ,you let me down. I love your amazing lyrics, great covers, and perfectly blended harmonies. I love that you are cool enough to co-star in Elf, and still manage to put out a decent(dare I say swell) album with M. Ward. But, the "Happening"? Really? Your awkwardly delivered lines and constant shifty eyes really bummed me out.

Don't even get me started on M. Night Shyamalan...

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Poop Deck

So on Tuesday I had to take my dear, sweet, mitsubishi to the dealer to repair a seat belt that was sticking(If the car hiccups my Dad takes it to the dealer, he's that guy)
Anyway, the perk of taking it to get repaired is that they wash it for free! Since my Dad demands weekly cleanings, I was stoked. It was clean and I didn't have to pay or lift a finger.

After work that night I headed to Bammer's to stay the night. It was quite fun, we had a hair dying party (one of life's simple pleasures*) and watched movies. Although, one of the downfalls of staying at her house is the parking. I had to park up on a hill, at an awkward angle. As if that isn't bad enough, I woke up to find this:

Apparently a group of unruly, renegade birds decided to pull together and destroy my car, while I slept. My Dad so eloquently remarked "They aimed at you from every angle." Indeed they did. Little pesks.

Anyway...It prompted an impromptu cleaning sesh, which I thoroughly enjoyed. The result: better than any cleaning job the dealer could have done.

It's the little things

Life's simple pleasures:

-Customers who actually respond when I say hello
-Making coffee on my day off
-Hair dying parties (Tita, you want to have one soon?)
-Sleeping in
-Being on time (Which is rare, yet quite enjoyable)
-Hearing Narrow Stairs playing in almost any trendy store I enter
-Sleepovers at Carrie's(No matter where they may take place: Mansion/Biola)
-Planning vacations
-Johnny Cash
-Catching up with old friends
-Bike Riding
-People who laugh at everything
-Hour-long lunch breaks at work(It is amazing what an hour does for your mood)
-Shopping with my sister and Mom

And I'll end it with that...

Monday, June 9, 2008


First of all, let me start out by chastising ALL those were supposed to take up the remainder of the 14 tickets(approximately) we had reserved. You guys missed out and let us all down. GOOD ONE. I won't name any names, but you are all flakes! Okay, I'll name names: Carrie, Landon, Blythe and her crew, Dickie and those who we invited last minute: Jono & Simone. Also, since we got the tickets online and let 7 of them go to waste we will most likely be banned from purchasing more in the near future(So says Carrie Marie). Although I have my doubts about this theory. (And all this should be read in my very sarcastic,non-angry voice: just to clarify)

All that said, the remaining die-hard PIR fans set out around 6 and 7 o'clock this Monday morning to reserve those seats closest to all the action, specifically: the camera.In order to achieve this goal, we took two cars. The ladies in one(Bethany, Bammer, Ashley, Pammy, and our new friend Breanne),departing around 6am to beat traffic and the boys in the other car( Frankie, Jordan, Johnny and myself)departing at 7am. Obviously, I am the exception to the "all guy" car...however I opted for leaving at 7 am instead at the break of dawn with the ladies. With traffic, the latter arrived just after 9 o'clock and thankfully for us, the ladies had already gotten the tickets and ensured our spots in line as #'s 86-92.

We then had the pleasure of waiting on benches for two hours or so, then proceeded to be name-tagged, and interviewed as a group. If you know anything about Frankie and Jordan, you know that when they get together people stare and laugh from amusement. And that is exactly what the 100 people did, who surrounded us on nearby benches. The entire two hours. Frankie entertained the crowd by catching peanuts with shocking swiftness and accuracy. Jordan entranced them by pointing out random items that people were eating such as : my fruit bowl and a nice lady's salad. And saying loudly "WHAT I wouldn't do for a ________" After a few times of saying "What I wouldn't do for a salad right now." That nice lady brought her half eaten salad down the row just for him. Needless to say, by the end of that time we had a group of fans that were convinced at least one of our red-clad group would be called to "COME ON DOWN!".

"Drew's Crew"

After the interviews, we were all ushered to MORE benches(located slightly closer to the set) where our phones and cameras were confiscated until after the show. We were placed in numerical order around 12:30 and waited there another hour or so. Total wait time: over five hours for the first car-load. However, when all that was done we were directed up the stairs to a room "smaller than seen on TV" and draped in 70's themed decor. While the groups were ushered in, to tunes like "Xanadu", "I will Survive" and "YMCA" no one seemed to be dancing.Our group just couldn't understand why. Soon one by one, our crew got up on our feet and began to move it to the tunes. Soon, the entire 300+ studio audience members were up on their feet groovin' to hits from the 70's. It was awesome. Then the announcer guy came out, with his corny voice and asked us if we were stoked to be there. The audience, a tad winded from all the dancin' but hyped for the show, jumped to their feet and burst out in applause(Which became less enthusiastic as the show progressed).

The show started, and in between takes Drew Carrey(who I had marked as the arrogant, game show host) came out to talk to the audience. He made inquiries about family, hometowns, occupations and topics of the like, to the various contestants and audience members. He signed shirts, gave hugs and told a lot of stories. He kissed a few ladies on the cheeks(upon their request) and really seemed like a great guy. There were so many interesting characters in the audience. For instance, one of the contestants, Doris, had come to the taping on June 9th, 2008 to fulfill a life long dream. She was not only an audience member, but she was actually called up to be a contestant. Her skill won her a treadmill and a kitchen dinette set. Much to her 20 something group members' delight. Some were on the verge of tears and others were jumping up and down. It turns out that Miss Doris had six months to live, and her family had all accompanied her to see her dream come true. It was so sweet, who knew that a game show could mean so much to someone? Another contestant, Matthew, from Boston: went to MIT and had the t-shirt to prove it. Yet poor Matthew couldn't seem to ever guess the right price, he stayed in his little bidding box the entire show. Bummer. However, apparently it was a lucky day on the show. Almost all of the contestants were winners. Some of the prizes included trips to both Mexico and Tahiti, as well as: a scuba set, jacuzzi, and living room collection. Anyway, although none of us were lucky enough to be chosen to "COME ON DOWN!" we had an amazing time, and oh yes...did I mention Frankie got Drew to sign his red shirt and give him a hug. Solid.

So amazing, the group and the game show. Definitely will be a next time.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Wake Me Up Before You Go

Today, I had to get blood taken. I've been shaky as of late, and I had a hip problem going on(which my doctor passively dismissed). So the tests were mostly due to the shakiness.

After filling out a long form, asking if I have ever had nearly,every kind of disease one could possibly imagine, I waited in my little room for the doctor for another hour(Reminding me why I hate the doctor's office). He moved my leg around, asked some questions and prescribed aleve and stretching before the gym. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! I waited for two hours just to be told to do what I already have been doing. Then when he asked if anything else was going wrong, I spilled my guts. I have a cold, and I tremble a lot:with or without food in my stomach. He said it could be familial tremors(but this was most likely not the case because of the lack of family history), then he said it could possibly be an overactive thyroid(then looked me and up and down and said "but.."(Which can only mean one thing, I am far too "hefty/healthy" looking to have an overactive thyroid which causes weight loss). Bummer. Then, He asked some more questions and told me he wanted blood tests.

So my Mom and I headed back to the lab this morning, I thought it wouldn't be too bad. I wasn't really nervous, until I saw her tie the rubberband around my arm. Then I began giggling, to keep from crying. The nurse, was like: "See not that bad? Although, I've never had someone laugh the whole time". I assured her that it was simply to keep me from passing out. Which, after I was done and in possession of three less vials of blood...I'm pretty sure I started to do. Things turned black,and my ears starting ringing. Then I about threw up, and apparently turned completely pale. TMI? Anyway, bad experience. Still have the cold, and my hip still hurts. Yep...really glad I went to the doctors.

Another thing,
Too many changes all at once. Not necessarily in my own life, but in the lives of those around me. Graduations, Girlfriends, Moving, Mission trips, Vacations...I'm getting the feeling that life is changing and I'm the only one that is still sitting complacent, stuck in the hum-drum of everyday life.

A couple of things I have come to value, and yet see little of: loyalty, honestly, optimism, stability, genuineness.

Saturday, May 24, 2008


This fall, it will be one year since I started working at Nordstrom. In one big leap of faith, I applied online and got a call back. Thanks Dona.

I said goodbye to: Mandeep (World's nicest boss), Free burritos and chai on Saturday mornings, Borrowing magazines from the Deli, Being asked to "make it thin" or substitute banana for pineapple, Working with one of my best friends, and wearing bright colored shirts paired with a (usually stained) pair of khakis--never out of style.

How I miss thee, sweet, sweet smoothie king.

Then I woke up to a reality that didn't involve sitting in the back on B's computer or doing homework, waiting for a customer to walk through the door.
It involved business casual apparel, putting on a smile no matter what, 8 HOUR SHIFTS, rude fellow employees: trying to steal my customers, being pressured into opening new accounts, making 50 phone calls to my "valued" customers while still trying to sell dresses to those who happen to stumble onto my floor, putting away more articles of clothing than I can imagine, trying to remember how to deal with shady customers who are trying to steal or return 500 dollar dresses that they stole from another Nordstrom,getting the run-around when trying to return things(simply, because I work there) and quite a few other things that make life at Nordstrom quite difficult.

*Another fun fact: every single employee that works on the second level of Nordstrom is a female. And if you have any experience with females who are all competing to increase their own sales, open new accounts, and form personal relationships with customers, you know that things can get quite ugly.

I have also really enjoyed getting to know the many ladies who have come and gone in the departments that surround my own. I really love the girls in active and narrative, we don't get mad at each other, and we don't steal sales. In fact, the other day a lady who was, of course, trying to return a 350 dollar dress that she stole(she's in the system for shop lifting) from another store, commented about how nice we all were to each other. Quite a rarity among competing females. Also, I have the best manager I could ever ask for: who certainly doesn't get enough respect or kudos for all she does. When she gets a bonus for making our department goal for the month(most managers keep it), she had bought us all dresses or on another occasion: given us all gift cards. Not to mention, she works her butt off to make sure that all of her girls get to work the days we want and have off the days we have school or activities. She is so amazing, I can talk to her about anything and she's always giving me sales that should have been hers. I love her. She makes working there worth it. Another thing that makes my job gratifying, is seeing a lady who has already decided that; her knees are too wrinkly, her thighs are huge and her arms are too flabby for a dress, walk away with a huge smile and a lovely dress that gives a boost of confidence and makes her feel great.It always makes me happy, oddly enough.

Dear Nordstrom-
I'm still undecided on how I feel about you.


To my awesome friend Carrie Marie(Panda/Mom/Former Bossy Youth Leader/Current Bossy friend). Today she graduated from BIOLA University with her bachelors in Biblical Studies. With crazy stories of Greek class, and other ridiculously difficult courses, it was definitely really awesome to see that ALL of her hard work paid off. Carrie, I know you worked really hard, even if you didn't have a little star by your name in the program. I'm so proud of you!

(The Tres Penguinos Halloween of '07)

Also, another jewel of a verse came out of my, often loathed, DailyBibleVerse emails:

I sing quite often, and I say a lot, but how much of what I say or sing is significant? It is not enough to do these things, it is more about the heart with which I do them. This was a reminder to constantly give thanks to my God in everything, for his mercy and abundant blessings.

Ephesians 5:19-20
Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Saturday, May 17, 2008


Today, I honestly saw something that broke my heart.

I was driving home from work, tired and barely aware of my surroundings, when I noticed an SUV in front of me with a huge sticker scrolled across the back window. I normally don't pay attention to things like that, but for some reason it caught my eye.

I began to read it, and then started crying.

The writing on the back window read:

In loving memory of (in bold letters),

My loving wife(with the date of her death)
Daddy's little angel
Daddy's boy
Daddy's little boy (with the distance between his birth and death being only one year)
and another name(with the date of his death beside it)

All of the dates of death were on July 17th of 2003.

I don't understand how someone can lose so many people they love, and still survive.
How do you recover, rebuild, and go one with your life after something so tragic?

I will never forget that sticker, and the sorrow I felt for that person inside.

Thursday, May 15, 2008


Finals are finished! I have officially completed my freshman year of college. Weird. The funny things is...I do not feel like I am smarter, or that I have learned any great lesson that I will carry with me through my life. I guess all the GE courses I took, could explain some of this. But, I just feel like I spent my entire freshman year procrastinating, barely skating by, scrambling to complete things, being overwhelmed and forming other unnecessary, non-beneficial habits.

I take that back, I have learned a life lesson. Procrastinating and being lazy in my study habits has gotten me no where. Being late, speeding, staying up late and other last minute make-up tactics can all be avoided: if I choose to be diligent and avoid putting things off.

Note to self: DO NOT PROCRASTINATE, its not worth all the stress it causes.

On a brighter note: whats done is done. Now I have the SUMMER to look forward too!!! Done, done, done:)

Wednesday, May 14, 2008


Today, while studying I ran across a map of various places where genocide and atrocities have taken place. I was astonished, it was a map of the world and a little over twenty places were marked with little red sculls and the death toll beside it. Each place had numbers ranging from 3 thousand to 20 million deaths. Personally, I was only really familiar with two of them. The Nazi extermination of Jews and Non-Arian Peoples during the Holocaust(12,000,000 in 1939-1945) and the genocide in
Rwanda(800,000 in 1994).

These are some of the sites that were shown on the map:

Iraq 1980-1999 (600,000 through ethnic cleansing and germ warfare)

USSR 1924-1987(20,000,000 through forced famine, ethnic cleansing, and political purges)

Nigeria 1967-1970 (1,000,000)

Turkey 1915-1918 (1,500,000 Armenians in Turkey)

Congo 1900-1908 (3,000,000)

Millions of people died: murdered, starved, raped and gassed. For what? Who is one group or dictator, to decide who is worthy of living? Why did no one stop them? Were there so many people, who agreed that a whole ethnic group should die to cleanse a nation? I don't understand.

Stefanie and I visited the Museum of Tolerance this weekend, I have been there twice: cried both times. So much pain, inflicted on these people who are just as valuable as the Germans who decided they were not.

Thoughts: mostly of grief for those who perished and fear for those who will have to answer to the God who created the people they chose to destroy.

Saturday, May 3, 2008

Good Luck

Things that I have noticed that are definitely standard in my life.

My room is always dirty, and the when I do make an attempt to clean it: It is thrashed by day two.

I am extremely awkward around people that I haven't seen in a long time, I literally would rather NOT say hello..than have to make awkward conversation.
Saying things are awkward all the time...makes things awkward ALL THE TIME.

As much as I try to save is impossible. I am still trying to figure out why there is under a hundred dollars in my account EVERY time pay day rolls around. Which means, it takes me approximately two weeks to blow through 500 bucks?!

I will never be gutsy enough to tell someone how I feel about them, even though I tell myself "life is short...who cares?"--I'm just not that convincing I guess.
(However, I'm pretty sure this is a good thing)

I will always spill, no matter what. I also make a ridiculous spill EVERY time I see Carrie Allen...only giving her more ammunition with which to torture me. Last week, while sitting at her "Rock for Justice" ticket booth...I convinced her to ask one of the guys going into the cafe, to bring me back an ice-cream cone. After he so graciously brought me back a cone filled with creamy goodness, I dropped the top half right off the cone. A chunk of ice-cream just plopped right down on the table.

My new favorite phrase is "Don't judge me." Works like a charm.

New favorite hand motion..."the wolf."
Thank you Pierce. Owwooooooo

Monday, April 28, 2008


So today I saw the Normans...well Tatum + kids anyways.
She stopped by to say hello while at my work, I LOVE when people come by, so it was quite a pleasure. It was good to see the kiddos and for the first time ever...they seemed pretty stoked to see me. Even Cade was creeping out of her chair and waving her arms to say hello(This is big, given that the Norman children usually don't like me in their earliest stages of life).

Anyhow, this made me think of Hawaii last summer and all the lovely memories that went along with it. Then I thought about how Ryah just turned 5, and I met Tate when she was pregz with her.Then one thought lead to another and now I'm reminiscing about the old days of youth group and being a freshmen again. Heck, just high school period. It was so much easier! I felt like I had a place to go(youth group), and even though I begrudged the strict rules(no two-piece bathing suites, no PDA, no slapping each others' butts;), I felt quite at home. I felt like I belonged at Calvary Laguna, on Wednesday nights and at really any time. I remember being nagged by the Normans to spill all the juicy gossip(or lack there of) when I'd babysit, bake sales/car washes, winter/summer camps, worship nights(Pizza, Prayer and Praise), small groups, the original FUZE(thank you ONEREPUBLIC for making our all-nighters legendary)and random overtimes on warm summer nights. I MISS IT ALL! I don't have pictures to blog, but I certainly do have some great images on file in my head.

Thursday, April 17, 2008


"Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know."

Jeremiah 33:3

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Wedding Bells.

My sister is getting married in less than six months! My beautiful, amazing sister is tying the knot! So weird, that she will be a wife and in a while: a mother. This thought is killing me. In my mind she has been and will remain 23 years old. Single gal(by choice...even though guys were constantly falling for her), friend lovin', party goin', waitressing, sister.She had a car and lived on her own by the time she was 18(I feel like such a slacker). In her condo by the beach, she continued to be free and live the crazy life of a twenty-somethin' year old. She has always been the big sister that I have always hoped to be like, and now she's morphing into this ultra-chic career women. She is affianced to an amazing guy and has a huge rock on her finger to prove it. She received her undergraduate degree in communications(public relations) and is now working for a small Public Relations Firm in Newport/Costa Mesa. She is only becoming more beautiful as she gets older, and to see her in her wedding dress was a truly spectacularly surreal moment.

Which brings me to the fact that: drum roll please... I am her maid of honor.
When I was younger and we had discussed her future wedding I had been told that someone older should be the maid of honor, so they could plan all the "events" and such. When she called me five or so months back to tell me that John had proposed, I didn't know what would happen. However, when we sat down in the hotel lobby(where he had popped the question) and she sat there gazing at her platinum engagement ring...she asked me to be her maid of honor. Tear* She told me that I was her best friend, and I was the only one she could see as her maid of honor(We were both crying.)Who knew that after all these years of petty sister squabbles, and arguments over borrowing clothes she would ask me to stand beside her on one of the most important days of her life. Time changes a lot, and I am so happy to be given this honor. We have truly become closer than I could ever have hoped for. And for this, I am truly thankful.

Which also reminds me that I have the "honor" of giving the toast at the reception.The thought alone gives me the creeps. All those eyes watching me, what will I say? Something sentimental? Something witty? Something Serious? Or all of the above? Oh well, I guess I'll figure it out when the time draws near. For now, I'll just shiver at the thought and push it to the back of my mind.

Congrats Crista!



(She is saying "ask")

Ok, excuse the use of the p word on the second video(luckily its just an anatomical term).

Seriously, HOW cute are these kids?
I love itsss.
They crack me up!

Sunday, April 13, 2008


We bow our hearts
We bend our knees
Oh Spirit come make us humble
We turn our eyes
From evil things
Oh Lord we cast down our idols

So give us clean hands
and give us pure hearts
Let us not lift our souls to another
Oh give us clean hands
and give us pure hearts
Let us not lift our souls to another
Oh God let this be
a generation that seeks
Who seeks Your face, Oh God of Jacob
Oh God let us be
a generation that seeks
Who seeks Your face, Oh God of Jacob

We bow our hearts
We bend our knees
Oh Spirit come make us humble
We turn our eyes
From evil things
Oh Lord we cast down our idols

So give us clean hands
and give us pure hearts
Let us not lift our souls to another
Give us clean hands--Oh God
and give us pure hearts
Let us not lift our souls to another
Oh God let us be
a generation that seeks
Who seeks Your face, Oh God of Jacob
Oh God let us be
a generation that seeks
Who seeks Your face, Oh God of Jacob

Oh God of Jacob

I love this song, by far one of the most touching worship songs for me, personally. I'm pretty sure I can narrow it down to the last part of the chorus, when the song cries out to the "God of Jacob". When I consider God in terms of his faithfulness to the "heroes" of the old testament, I remember that his faithfulness didn't end when the last book of the old testament was completed. He is still the faithful God of Jacob, Moses, Joshua, and David, to this day. He is the mighty God who wiped out the armies of Egypt when they threatened his people. He is the mighty God who parted the red sea, Who sent manna from Heaven to provide for his children, and caused the walls of Jericho to fall to the ground. Hearing this song reminds me that my God is faithful and mighty. And I can call out his name asking for purity and diligence in seeking his face, and he will hear me...and answer.

Psalm 24:1-10

Thursday, April 10, 2008

Shout to the LORD!

I think this is so amazing...
I can't tell you how many times I have heard this in church. I love this song, it was always my favorite growing up(Yes, I know I'm still growing). Who knew that the millions who tune in to American Idol weekly, would ever have a chance to hear this on National Television. The great thing is, its not some random Lawrence Welk re-run gone into sindication on TBN--it is prime time TV!

God is so good!

Sunday, April 6, 2008


One more thing,

I have been shown quite a lot of this lately by those who, in my opinion, owe me the very least. The 500 dollars I owed, to pay for the dent in my neighbors car, should have actually been 709 dollars. My neighbor told my Dad that I was a "good kid", and because it was an accident he wanted to pay anything over and above my insurance deductible. Which means, he payed over two hundred dollars that he didn't have to pay, to repair the damage caused by my carelessness. Then my parents wrote him the check for the 500 dollars and told me I could make payments. I thought this was really swell, considering I was quite short of that amount in my bank account(I am not a saver). Then this morning my Mom came in my room and wanted to talk, with the way things have been going lately, this sounded ominous. However, she just wanted to tell me that her and my Dad wanted to show me grace. They wanted to pay for half of my debt, and told me I could pay off the rest in smaller increments.

Thank you Lord for those who show me grace that I do not deserve.


Once again, I should be writing my English paper--and yet I am inspired to write about nothingness.

All inhibitions aside, today was a truly magnificent day. Not because of anything that happened or the way my life is going currently, it was just beautiful. If you didn't look out the window or spend time out of doors: you missed out. The day was flawless outside. My life has been so confusing lately, like I said in my earlier post. I feel like all that is in me is wanting to escape; from work, school and people. Completely discontent with the way things are going, I have something similar to a 7-year itch (slightly premature). Yet today after a short nap and a good cup of coffee(compliments of my brother), I decided to go outside and take advantage of what was left of the beauty of the day. I was surprised to find that it was almost fully intact, the way the sky was turning made the leaves and the air look and feel clean/fresh. It was kind of windy, which made riding my bike all the more enjoyable. I went with my Dad (Turry--to all my friends), who I have lately been quite on edge with. I guess with all my mishaps(s), as of late, things have been a bit tense between us. However today was great, we had a long overdue conversation ranging from car buying to bible college(It was a long ride). After telling him how much I feel like my life is monotonous and how jealous I am of friends who have "gotten away" from it all, he reminded me of the beauty that is all around me. It was hard to argue when the day had been truly lovely, and we were out in the perfection of God's creation. I am blessed to be where I am, and I love the fact that I take after my dad. Since I can remember, he has never failed to point out the snow on the mountains or the way the sun was setting, and say "Thank you Lord, for the beautiful day". I feel like I have always felt closest to God when I am surrounded by the wonder of his creation. A long time ago, I heard in a message something that really struck me as profound. The guy teaching brought out that God didn't have to make things beautiful, or pleasant to us. Food didn't have to taste good, his creation didn't have to be lovely...but he did. Personally, I think God made things beautiful to remind us of what we will have one day in Heaven.

Thank you Lord for the beauty you so graciously placed in your handiwork.

Psalm 19:1-3
" The heavens declare the glory of God;
the skies proclaim the work of his hands.

Day after day they pour forth speech;
night after night they display knowledge.

There is no speech or language
where their voice is not heard. [a]"

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Well Aware

I have recently become quite aware of just how awkward I am...

and I have been spilling more than usual. I don't know what is going on.

Awkward handshakes, Talking too fast on the phone(making it really awkward for the other person), Hugs that just weren't meant to be, Saying stupid things, Working too little, Crying too much, Not working out enough,Procrastinating , Never paying attention to my surroundings(resulting in car accidents and exaggerated clumsiness) ....

Life has been weird as of late. Or at least I HAVE been weird as of late.

Side Note:

Proverbs 3:5-6
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart; and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him and he shall direct your path."

I used to constantly recite this scripture when I was afraid, or unclear about the direction of my life. I think it is a verse worthy of re-visiting, and this is certainly a good time to do so .

Sunday, March 30, 2008


This week has been by far one of the hardest of my life. It is so sad to me that in this last week alone, I have seen more friends than I have in months(possibly years). So many people that I just got too busy to call, or visit. I feel like that is what happened with Josh, I just became so busy that he was just another person I neglected to stay in touch with. Looking at pictures of him with his long, curly hair ( Linda said he was growing it out to donate), and the hat that he (apparently) wore all the time; brought on feelings of realization. I never saw him with long hair, I don't remember the hat that he never took off and I did not know that he was in so much pain. All these things I would have observed, if I had only taken the time to remember my friend.

I knew Josh all the way through high school, we went to the same church and when I joined
SCA we went to the same school. My earliest memories of Josh consist of him playing the sportscaster in our news team and him slurring over "Lebron James" in his sports-segment. During our practices he would say his lines really fast and somehow it always sounded like he was mumbling at a rapid speed(which is usually impossible). It was constantly "Josh E-N-U-N-C-I-A-T-E!" Mrs. Nogy and his Mom were always on him. Yet, he just kept plowing through the lines at the same rapid pace. Trying to juggle difficult sentences and ridiculous cliches, while making an effort to enunciate enough to appease them. Those were some of the most entertaining nights of my life. Trying to get our mess of a group to be uniform, and struggling to put together a convincing version of a newscast. We managed to pull it off three times, and finally take a win the third year of competition.

When Josh's Dad, Ed, was really sick in his senior year,
Rebbecca thought it would be a good idea for Josh and I to do a Duo-Interp (An interpretation of literature: performed by two people) that she had hand-selected for us. With all the pain of slowly losing his Dad, she thought it would be a good distraction for Josh. For me it was like pulling teeth, I hated(still hate) public speaking and yet I was swindled into doing competitive speech for three years in a row. When I was whining and complaining(sometimes crying) with discouragement, Josh never gave up. At his memorial service I heard so many stories of how strong and determined Josh was, I can attest to it. His Dad was really sick when the competition time came around, and yet not for a minute did he hesitate to perform. In fact, I remember performing our duo for Ed in their living room during one of our many practices. No, we didn't win a trophy that competition...we didn't even place. But, I have so many memories of late nights at my house with my Mom and Rebbecca breathing down our necks. The same story, "Josh, slow down and enunciate!" and "Josh, act like you love her!" and he did the very best he could...all the way through to the end. I also remember Josh at the Kauai garage sale, and on the trip. I just recall this one night, mid-mission trip when I had gotten word that Josh had told AJ to go ahead and "go for me". I was fuming and decided to set him straight. It is funny looking back, how things like that seem so insignificant now. I think that is one thing I have truly begun to realize since I found out that Josh passed away: how short life is and how meaningless it is to place life's busy-work(school/work) before human relationships, before people who need a friend. So many are hurting and in need of a shoulder, an ear, an "I love you". I think that "life" gets in the way of what really matters: the people who are in it.